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Campfire Stories
Bob Cea, Andrzej Krakowski, Jeff Mazola

My fiends where do I start on this one? Maybe with the annoying voice over at the start, The CGI flaming skull at the beginning, maybe that should have been a sign of things to come! Words I could use to describe this film include trash, boring, unoriginal, tiresome, crap and of course, poorly made.
Those of you that may have watched a funny little show called “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” starring Charlie day, well he is not the only up and comer in this awful movie, also starring in one of the really poorly made short stories is Rob McElhenney.
However back to the movie itself; whenever a story starts around a campfire and the storyteller says, around 20 years ago in a mental facility…that should ring some pretty loud bells, but we all watch to see either a cult classic or train wreck in the making.
The first story of the kids picking on the mentally challenged caretaker was immediately pathetic! The so-called leader of the gang Donnie, has been playing splinter cell way too much…he has as much military experience as he does acting ability. Example of poor acting, in the first story when Kenny decides to leave and go back, on his way he gets his neck broken against a tree by said mentally challenged caretaker; he’s thrown to the ground and although being dead from having his neck broken, he makes the noise of “ouch” as he lands on the ground.
Into the second story, I can see where effects were milked in this one! The green screen was completely abused in this story. The Native American doing his ritual by the fire, the very strange CGI done to produce the animals was so bad; I think the person should never work again in the film industry, unless they undertake some form of training.
It was a very limited script in the whole film for all characters. I understand that maybe it didn’t have such a huge budget but come on!! Really?? Unfortunately the acting didn’t get any better.
The third story was super over-acted by lead actress Abigail Spencer, in this little campfire tale… oops I mean story. If I was tortured, beaten and told I had no choice I need to choose one of the stories, I guess the third story was the best out of the lot, but still, would not be over excited about ever watching it again.
As for the so-called surprise ending… All I would ask to the writers and directors is ‘surprise to who?’ because to be honest I saw that coming not just a mile away but all the way from the intro of the ranger!!

STAY AWAY from this one folks… I will finish this review off by referring to the beginning of the actual story, there is a song, “welcome to my hell”… no, welcome to my hell!”

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